August 30, 2010

Cut off.

I'll be the first to admit that this has been a slow process. I might even venture to say it's been a long time coming. Either way, as of August 2010, I have officially been cut off. Over the course of the past year, my mother has slowly but surely cut away any and every financial tie that she once had to me.

It started subtly. When making a trip to Little Rock for the weekend, the time will inevitably come that one must fill her vehicle with gasoline in order to make it back to her previous location. And if you can't figure out who the "her" is in this scenario, well... I really have no words for you. I digress. One such day rolled around in May 2009. Master's degree in hand. Paycheck in the near, but not near enough, future. After my Sunday afternoon nap, I casually eyed my mom's purse as I told her that I would probably hit the road after I filled my car up with gas. Her response was as follows: "Ok, well it's been nice having you here this weekend". Uh oh. Avoidance at its best. It was all too clear where this was going. "Well, can I use your Sam's card?", I replied. This was my passive-aggressive way of asking for the American Express that rested on top of that Sam's card in T-Money's wallet. When she said I could, my heart fluttered with joy. Praise the Lord. However, when she made a beeline for her purse and only handed me one card, I felt like I did when she told me that my beloved goldfish, Goldy (my creativity astounds even myself), of 3 faithful years, had passed on to the other side. And as I filled my car's tank with gas and watched that meter climb and climb and climb, I felt it... Snip.

The second blow came exactly six months after I finished graduate school. I know this because apparently you get a six month grace period before you have to start paying back your student loans. Student loans? Ohhh, so that's where that money came from. Snip.

I'll admit I brought this next one upon myself. I wanted an iPhone. And I wanted one badly. In fact, I wanted one so badly that I abandoned my family's plan, switched providers, and knowingly began paying my own phone bill. But, I'm not going to even act like this was a mistake. I have Words with Friends. And you know, you really can't put a price on that. Snip.

So here we are in August of 2010. A couple weeks ago, I made the trek to Little Rock to see my beloved mother. Exhausted from working all day and making that monotonous drive for the billionth time, I opened the door to the familiar smell of the house I grew up in. Ah, home sweet home. I cruised straight back to the room where I spent the better part of my childhood, dropped my bags, and sorted through the mail that my mom had neatly stacked on my dresser. Wedding invitation, baby shower invitation, wedding invitation, requests to donate money I don't have to my respective alumni associations, wedding invitation... And then, there it was. Right there at the bottom of the pile. The bill for my car insurance. Well damn. My life as a dependent was officially over. That was the final straw. A straw to the tune of three-hundred-and-some-odd dollars. Snip. Snip. Snip. Crash. Burn.

So here I am, just me and the real world. Overwhelming people with my mediocrity on a daily basis.

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